Highlights of 2016

I had actually forgotten all about this annual post until reading the one from last year.  At the end of every year for the past five years, I have made a list of the most awesome (or not-so-awesome) things that have happened.  2016 has been a hell year for a lot of people, and it's definitely had some intense downs for me, as well as ups.  Since I don't want to break the tradition, let's get crackin'.

January

• 4 January – I traveled to see Theo in person for the first time from Montréal to Tennessee and spent a week with him.
• 7 January – I rented a 2016 Ford Fiesta and drove up to Kentucky to surprise my mom and aunt (with the help of my sister, Emily), as Theo worked late nights at that time.
• ? January – I began a series of four coaching sessions with Gabrielle Destroismaisons, my friend and one of my favorite singers, to prepare to enter a singing competition.
• 15 January – I saw Bruno Pelletier perform his Musique et cinéma show with Guy St-Onge for the last time in Joliette, as it was the final show of the tour.
• 19 January – My mom went to the hospital and was diagnosed with pancreatitis, the first time of many.
• 22 January – Went ice skating on the frozen lake at the Parc Lafontaine and seriously hurt my bad knee.
• 23 January – Went to the ER at the Hôpital Général de Montréal only to be told that there was nothing they could do.
• 30 January – I pierced my tongue!  It was more painful than the Internet said it would be.  I loved the piercing, but I experienced some complications later, so I ended up letting it close in May.  Sad.

February

• 2 February – Theo got me a bouquet of plush dinosaurs for Valentine’s Day.  It was magical.
• All of February – Montréal was very, very cold.
• 20 February – Kate came to see me in Montréal and we argued about how to pronounce “pasta” and she was wrong.
• 23 February – Because Theo and I couldn’t wait any longer, I went to go see him in Tennessee again.
• 26 February – I rented a Toyota Camry and drove down to Georgia with Theo to surprise my family for my little sister Mary’s ninth birthday, aided by my sister, Sarah.
• 28 February – Theo gave me his old guitar and I named her Lzzy.

March

• 4 March – Something cool happened, but I can’t tell you what it was.  But it was cool.
• 9 March – I began writing a non-fiction epistolary book, basically stream of conscious, about Québec.  I haven’t really continued it since I left.
• 11 March – I began taking a month-long workshop about teaching at university that ended up being useless.
• 30 March – I left the dorm and moved to an apartment much closer to my campus.

April

• 1 April – The seventh anniversary of me studying French.
• 10 - 15 April – I chronicled the passage and sinking of the Titanic on Facebook.
•  22 April – I completed my first and only year of grad school.
• 24 April – I flew to Tennessee to be with Theo.

May

• 7 May – Chopped all my hair off.  It was down to the middle of my back and I cut it to above my shoulders.  Sob.
• 8 May – Took a bus from Nashville to Lexington to spend a while with my family in Kentucky.
• 12 May – I was offered to be a preceptor for both sessions of JBA instead of just the second.
• 21 May – My mom was hospitalized again for pancreatitis.
• 22 May – My other mom in Georgia was also hospitalized.
•  23 May – My mom was released from the hospital.

June

• 6 June – I took a bus from Lexington to St. Louis.  It was very, very long.  But I also got to see David, Deb, and one of my bestest friends in the whole wide world, Kat!!
• 8 June – JBA started!

July

• 2 July – JBA session 1 ended.
• 4 July – I spent Independence Day in Hannibal, chilling at Java Jive.
• 6 July – JBA session 2 commenced.
• 20 July – I made the decision to leave Concordia (and my beloved Montréal).  Theo and I decided that I should move in with him in Tennessee.
• 31 July – JBA session 2, and my final JBA session, ended.  And Theo took a bus to St. Louis to come see me!

August

• 2 August – Theo bought Harry Potter and the Cursed Child for me as an early birthday present.  It was awful.
• 7 August – Theo took a bus back to Nashville and Kat and I flew up to Montréal together.  Whilst walking around near the Place-des-Arts, we stumbled upon the First Peoples Festival, which was awesome.
•  8 August – After many delays and being forced to spend the night in Chicago, Lauren finally arrived in Montréal!  Later, Kat got to try her first “real” poutine at La Banquise.  And she loved it!
•  9 August – Dinner at a microbrewery (Les Trois Brasseurs) and dessert at Le Chocolat Favoris, where you can get soft-serve topped with a shell of chocolate.  Drool.  We went there a lot.
• 10 August – Bruno Pelletier was filming an episode of Mario Tessier’s show, Permis de Chanter, along rue Ste-Catherine, just a couple of metro stops from my apartment.  We almost missed him because he was scheduled to be at the corner of rue Ste-Catherine and rue Union at a certain time, but a post on his Twitter showed that he wasn’t there.  However, he had taken a selfie and posted, and we were able to identify the signs behind him to figure out that they were still filming at a park a couple blocks away.  So we headed over there and voilà!  I got to talk to Bruno for a bit and say goodbye, he remembered Lauren, and Kat got to meet him for the first time!  We were also on TV and I danced with Mario Tessier while Bruno sang karaoke in the background.
•  11 August – We took a bus to Québec City and a ferry to Lévis.
• 12 August – My mom was hospitalized yet again.  Kat and I also ziplined down the Vieux-Port.
• 14 August – Kat flew back to St. Louis. :(  Later, Lauren and I met up with my friend François and we saw the Montréal Pride Parade and were waved at by Raven-Symoné and the Canadian Prime Minister, Justin Trudeau.
• 15 August – Lauren flew back to Wisconsin. :(
• 16 August – My mom was released from the hospital.
• 19 August – Flew to Michigan to spend a few days with my family and retrieve the car my grandparents gave me, Bumblebee (B.B. for short.)
•  21 August – Got to see and spend time with my oldest niece, Leah!
•  22 August – Got to see and spend time with my sister, Dawn, and her daughter, Sarah!
• 24 August – Drove fifteen hours from Michigan to Montréal.
• 25 August – The worst day of packing and parking ever.
• 26 August – Began the drive down to Bell Buckle a day early to surprise Theo.  Spent the night in Beachwood, Ohio.
• 27 August – Arrived in Bell Buckle!
• 29 August – My twenty-fifth birthday.  Also, Theo proposed.  EEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

September

•          1 September – Aunt Chris stopped by to visit on her way down to Georgia.
•         21 September – Surprised my mom in Kentucky again. Muwahaha.

October

• We carved Jack-o-Lanterns.  It was fun.  Aaaand that’s about it.  There was also a huge craft festival in Bell Buckle.

November

•           1 November – I began NaNoWriMo for the thousandth time.
•           8 November – I voted for the first time.
•           21 November – Drove up to Kentucky to pick up my mom and sister for Thanksgiving.
•      23 November – Headed back down to Tennessee with Mom and Emily.  They had never met Theo in person before!
•           24 November – Thanksgiving!  Mom and Emily got to meet my future in-laws and vice versa!
•           29 November – I finished NaNoWriMo a day early with 50,176 words!

December

•     1 December – Mommy’s birthday!  She got to see and pet a couple horsies, Emily and I made her a cake, we watched Inside Out, and we put up our Christmas tree!
•      5 December – Drove back to Kentucky.
•     7 December – Back down to Tennessee.  Theo watched Titanic with me and it made me feel loved.
•     13 December – 1-year anniversary dating my Theo.
•     21 December – Went to the Opryland Hotel and Resort to see the lights and stuff with Theo, his dad, and uncle.
•     22 December – Opening presents via Skype (in person for them) with my lovely Lauren and Kat.
•     23 December – Present day with my wonderful future in-laws.  I was also accepted to Middle Tennessee State University to work on getting a license to teach high school French.
•     25 December – Christmas!  I made my first big dinner.
•     30 December – I finished a puzzle for the first time in, like, ever.

Golly that was long.  I’m all out of words.  Some things in 2016 were great, some not so great.  Here’s hoping 2017 is out of this world!  (As I’m getting married, I assume it will be.)  Noodles.

I done did it again

Obviously the effort of posting at least one entry a month isn't going to happen anymore.  Or maybe I can start anew next year.  I didn't manage to write anything for November, which, personally, I think is very understandable since I was bogged down with transcription, NaNoWriMo, and then spent the last ten or so days with my mom and sister, whom I brought down to spend Thanksgiving with us in Tennessee.  I actually started a post in the last few days of November, but it was extremely late at that point, and I was just too exhausted.  So here I am, six days after the start of December.  Shame on me.

Moving on.  Like I said, I was lucky enough to be able to spend Thanksgiving surrounded by family: the family I've had my whole life and the family I'll be officially a part of this time next year.  I drove up to Kentucky on the Monday before Thanksgiving, spend a day there, and drove back down to Tennessee with my mom and sister on Wednesday.  The drive is about six hours, plus stops, so it's not too bad, but my mom and sister had this inconvenient need to eat, which I usually avoid while driving long distances, so it took a bit longer than usual.  How dare they.  Anyway.  We arrived home at about 4pm on Wednesday, at which point they finally met Theo in person for the first time.  Yep, that's right: Mom and Emily had never met him before now due to the fact that it had just never really been possible.  Theo met my dad, my other mom, and my siblings down in Georgia when we went to surprise Mary (my youngest sister) for her birthday last February, but that's only a three hour drive, and we were back home that same day.  It's not really possible to do that with the drive to Kentucky, and we'd have to get a hotel, etc. etc. etc.  Theo also met my Aunt Chris on her way down from Michigan to Georgia.  But now he's met my mom and sister, who, incidentally, is one of my bridesmaids.  Finally!  I was nervous.  So was he.  So were they.  But everything was peachy.

On Thanksgiving day, we went to Theo's parents house for dinner, along with Theo's sister, her husband and two daughters, and a friend of Theo's parents.  It was freakin' delicious and Theo's family was so kind and welcoming.  I feel so lucky and thankful for marrying into such a wonderful, close family.  You see everywhere about the dreaded in-laws, but my in-laws are absolutely amazing.  Theo's parents even gave me a huge, stuffed dolphin.  What could be better than that?

Mom's birthday was on December 1, and it was the first time in a while that she was able to truly celebrate it.  Emily and I made a white cake with milk chocolate frosting and it reaffirmed my dislike for baking.  But it was yummy!  My mom also adores horses just as much as I love cows (which is a lot), so we were able to go to a friend of Theo's parents to see their two horses.  Mom got to feed them and pet them, and it was magical.  Then, after Theo got home from work, Emily and I made dinner of (my personal favorite [don't worry, Mom likes it, too]) goulash, we all watched Inside Out, and then we set up the Christmas tree.  It was lovely.

All in all, the visit was awesome and I'm so glad it happened.  Right now I'm in Kentucky again, having driven back up with Mom and Emily.  Originally the plan was for me to leave this morning, but I'm utterly exhausted, so I've decided to stay an extra night and leave tomorrow morning.  I'm glad to spend the extra time with them, but I also miss Theo.  Ahhh, to be torn as I am.

Oh, I forgot to mention.  I won the aforementioned NaNoWriMo!  I won on November 29 with a total of 50,176 words.  And it was exhausting and difficult.  But I did it!  It's not the first time I've won, but it's still immensely satisfying, especially since I've been attempting NaNoWriMo for eleven years now, and I've only won three or four times.  Yay!

Noodles.

The couple that builds a desk together stays together

My favorite month (October, in case you're slow) is upon us!  For a while I flip-flopped between what my favorite season was, deciding it was Spring because of the relative warmth and the flowers, but let's be honest: nothing can beat Fall.  Nothing.  NOTHING.  I love the changing leaves, the cooling temperatures, the rain, and all the memories associated with October.  October has been a big month for me over the past eight years: re-discovering The Hunchback of Notre-Dame and thus meeting Lauren and Kate (two of my closest friends and two of my bridesmaids), discovering the music of Bruno Pelletier, traveling to Québec and seeing Bruno perform and meeting him for the first time, interviewing him for US Bruno Fans six years later on the anniversary of when I first met him, meeting Karen and Heather in person for the first time and seeing Bruno in Québec City, meeting Kate in person for the first time... yeah, it's crazy. I love October.  There are certain songs that take me right back to certain Octobers throughout my life.  I love it.

Also, Halloween.  And Hallow's End on World of Warcraft, because that's soops fun.

October is also NaNoWriMo prep month!  For those who don't know what that is, NaNoWriMo stands for National Novel Writing Month, which takes place during November.  It was started in 1999 (I believe) by Chris Baty in San Francisco with him and some of his friends.  Since then, it has grown exponentially and now thousands of people from all over the world participate.  The goal is to write 50,000 words in a month.  Most people start a brand new novel, but some people (called "rebels") write short stories, poetry, non-fiction, edit past works, or something like that.  I myself have been participating on and off since 2005 when I was fourteen after finding out about it on DarkMark, the Harry Potter message board I frequented at the time.  For the past few years I've written fanfiction, but this year I'm starting an all-new novel!  Okay, it's not all new; it's based on an idea that I started writing back in 2009, except now it's been revamped (get it? because it's about vampires).  Maybe it'll be published one day; who knows?  Either way, I'm excited.  There's a group of local participants meeting up in Murfreesboro (a city about twenty minutes away) next week and throughout November, so I'm doubly excited for that.  Yay!

We also got me a desk!  Yay!  The fun part was putting it together (not).  It was extremely frustrating.  The first night we found out that we would need a super short flat head screwdriver (because of course they couldn't tell us this in the beginning).  So we had to wait until Theo got home the next day so we could go get one.  That night, we worked on it some, but it was extremely frustrating and difficult, as the bulk of the desk uses cam locks, and those things suck.  We just couldn't get them to, well, lock, which kind of defeats the purpose.  Ugh.  So the next day, day three, while Theo was at work, I sat down and finally finished the stupid thing.  And I'm using it now.  I love it now.  Although I'm still recovering.

In other news, I've started some freelance work as a proof-reader and a sort of transcriptionist for a retired Truman professor.  It's fun!  More yay!  Noodles.

Depression

I'm writing this from my mother and sister's living room in Kentucky.  It seems that I'm always in a different place when I write my entries these days, n'est-ce pas?  I decided the night before last, on Tuesday, that I wanted to surprise my family in Kentucky, as I'll (hopefully) be getting a job soon and I won't have any time off for a while and I'm only six hours away.  I haven't been closer than twelve hours for five years, so it's pretty awesome.  I left around 8am from home and arrived around 4pm EST, so about seven-ish hours of driving, which isn't bad at all for a driver of my caliber.  I surprised Mommy again.  Teehee.

But the main reason I've decided to write in my blog is to talk about something.  There's a "thing" going around in which people describe themselves in three fictional characters, or post three pictures of fictional characters who they feel represent them as a person.  Obviously I love stuff like this, so I really thought of it and decided on three characters: Nymphadora Tonks from Harry Potter, Phoebe Buffay from Friends, and Sadness from Inside Out.

I didn't struggle with the decision to include Sadness.  As soon as she came to me, it was a lightbulb moment.  I've related to her from the moment I saw Inside Out, a movie I adore and highly recommend.  However, maybe it surprised people that I chose a character who is the representation of depression to represent who I am.

I've dealt with depression for around thirteen years.  That's over half my life.  And I was only medicated for it for less than a year while I had access to Canada's universal healthcare.  When I say I deal with depression, I don't mean I have "sad spells."  It's been bad.  It's affected my life and my relationships.  But luckily I'm surrounded by people who love me and who understand and who don't let my depression change their feelings for me.

For a brief moment, I was embarrassed.  I've never denied that I had depression, but did I want to broadcast it by adding Sadness?  Then I thought: why not?  Why give in to the stigma that surrounds mental health?  By adding Sadness, I'm not "broadcasting" my depression, I'm showing how much she has helped me.  She helped me realize that it's okay to feel sad and depressed and it's okay if you can't change for other people and that you shouldn't have to, that people who truly matter love you for who you are and don't want to change.  She reminds me that I wasn't made differently than everybody else, that I'm not alone.

Depression sucks.  It really sucks.  Depression and anxiety both suck.  And they can be all over the place.  Maybe I'll wake up one day and get things done and feel like a great member of society.  For me, even going to the grocery store is an accomplishment, especially if I don't put it off until the last minute.  I'll go to bed with so many plans of what I'm going to do the next day, and when I wake up, I'll find that I just can't.  I'm physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausted.  And a mere mention of what is making me so depressed and anxious (re: job search) can only make it worse.  Depression about being jobless, anxiety about finding a job, and guilt about not having one yet are not good combos.  And it's not like those are the only reasons I feel depressed and anxious.  I can't bring myself to be the best friend I want to be, and that just adds to my anxiety, depression, and guilt for not being able to truly reach out to my best friends and say, "Hey!  I love you guys!  Let's talk!" because I don't want to bring them down, yet I know it won't, and yet ....

Depression, as my dear Lauren put it, is a constant battle.  And sometimes you win that battle and other days you don't.  But it's important never to quit fighting.  And to realize that people do love me, and care about me, and want me to succeed.  And that Theo doesn't resent me for not having a job yet, or Lauren and Kat aren't mad at me for not having been able to reach out to them.  They understand.  They get me.  They're there for me.  People relate.

None of this is easy.  It's hard.  It's so, so very hard.  There have been times when I have truly wanted to die, to cease to exist, and just disappear.  Depression isn't easy and it's not over.  But it's a war.  And I like to think I'm winning.

Movin' on

As I write this, I'm sitting in my grandparents' living room in Michigan. I've been here since Friday and I'm leaving tomorrow morning, but not by air, no. I'll be driving! My wonderful grandparents were kind enough to give me a car as a gift for my graduation from Truman last year. Obviously, though, I've been living in Montréal since late August, and a car isn't really necessary up there. However, as you might've seen on my Facebook a while ago, in a few days I won't live in Québec anymore. So I'm here in Michigan to see my family and pick up the car. Tomorrow I'll drive it to Montréal and arrive in the evening before spending a couple days loading B.B. (short for Bumblebee, of course; she is a 2009 Chevy Aveo) with my stuff. Then I'm heading down to Tennessee (a seventeen hour drive, I might add) to live with my boyfriend, Theo.

Later

Okay, so I started writing that on Tuesday, August 23.  It is now Tuesday, August 30.  Now I'm in Tennessee, but I don't live with my boyfriend.

I live with my fiancé!  EEEEE!!

I'm not excited or anything.

But I'm getting ahead of myself.  It's gonna be a long post, so buckle up.

I had a great visit in Michigan with my family or, as my grandmother described it, "delightful."  I got to spend time with my oldest sister and my niece, my other niece (the daughter of my brother, David), my aunt, and my cousins!  Not to mention my amazing grandparents, who let me intrude upon them in their home for about a week.  I love going up there to see everyone and wish I could do it more often.  However, now I'm only living eight hours away and on the way from them to my dad, so maybe pit stops can be made!

Like I said, I left Michigan on the 24th of August and drove up through Ontario and into Montréal in one day.  It was exhausting.  Google Maps estimated about 10.5 hours and my GPS (a birthday present from the marvelous David and Deb) said about twelve.  With stops, it took about fifteen.  Two hours were stops for gas and food and one hour was for Toronto traffic.  God, that was a nightmare.  It wasn't scary, per se, which is great, seeing as I'm a very anxious person, but it was just long.  So very long.  I got into Montréal at about eleven.  And that's where the real fun begins.

Now, it might shock you, but parking in Montréal is a real expletive.  The apartment I lived in was situated on a one-way street next to Avenue Atwater.  The street, Boulevard de Maisonneuve, is actually huge and eventually becomes a pretty busy street further into the city, but the section I lived on was narrow and more calm (outside of rush hour).  Right next to my apartment building was a narrow parking lot set up by Indigo, a parking lot company (a lucrative business in Montréal, I imagine) with 24h parking.  There were no street spots available, but luckily the parking lot had a few.  So I pulled in and, to my relief, saw that when I paid for the spot, I had it until 4am the next morning, which was all I needed.  So I went upstairs and collapsed on my bed.

Whilst trying to fall asleep, I had a cartoon moment of lying in peace and solitude when my eyes snapped open in horror and I realized: the payment receipt had said 4am of the 25th, which was a mere four hours away by this point, not over twenty-four like I had thought.  As tempting as it was to leave my car there until a decent hour of the morning, I wasn't willing to risk my car being ticketed, or worse, towed, so I went back down to see if I could add more hours to my spot.  I couldn't.  I drove around and tried to find another spot, anything, but there was nothing.  So I took the car back to the Indigo lot and went upstairs and tried to sleep for approximately three-and-a-half hours.  I'd never felt such anxiety in my life, feeling hot and sick and wanting to sleep but completely unable to.  At four o'clock, I went downstairs and, to my relief, saw that I was able to move my car to a street spot just a few yards away from my building.  And, even better, it was free until 9am.  So I parked the car and went back upstairs to attempt to sleep some more.

At 8:55am, I went back downstairs, thinking I would add 24h to the spot and everything would be great.  (The original plan was for me to leave on the 27th and arrive in Tennessee on the 28th, but I wanted to surprise Theo a day early, so I only had one day to get everything ready.)  Well, the parking meter, called a Pay and Go, would only allow me two hours.  Great.  But the "great" thing about a Pay and Go is that there is an app so you can add more time to your spot without having to physically go to your car.  Well, for some reason, despite my phone being Canadian and my Google account having my Canadian address attached to it, the Google Play Store refused to believe that I lived in Canada and so wouldn't allow me to download the app.  This meant that I had to make sure I was back at my apartment every two hours without fail.  So instead of being able to go out and cancel my bank account, leave school, terminate my phone contract, and do all that fun stuff all at once, I had to keep coming back to pay more money for the parking spot.  Luckily, the apartment was downtown so it wasn't very far, but still.  It was a pain.

So amidst all of this, I also needed to pack and load B.B. with all my stuff.  And doing this in a non-air conditioned apartment is very difficult.  Not to mention the fact that I lived on the fourth floor, so I had three flights of stairs to climb each time.  It was exhausting.  More parking troubles popped up around 3pm when I went to go add more time to my spot.  It would only allow me a half-hour.  I looked at the hours posted on the meter and it said "Monday-to Friday, 9am to 3:30pm, 5:30pm to 9pm."  Now, after 9pm it's free, so I thought, "Maybe that means it's free for these two hours?"  But that didn't make sense for rush hour.  Thank God the Indigo lot had spots available.  I pulled in and, instead of dealing with a machine, I talked to a guy who said I could park there for the evening.  The ticket didn't give me a specific time, and when I asked him, he just said, "Until tonight.  You know, 10 or 11."  Great.  But at least I had several hours where I didn't have to worry about.

I decided to leave my car there all night since the guy had said I had it for the evening.  (Plus, around 10 or 11, there was no where else to put it.)  I managed to get everything loaded into the car around 12:30, which had been my goal, so I collapsed and went to sleep.  I woke up at 6:30 and went downstairs to add more time to the spot.  The woman said that I could leave now and everything would be fine, or I would have to pay another $11 even though I just wanted a couple more hours. Yay.  So I coughed up the money and finished packing and cleaning.  I got out of the apartment around 8:15 aaaand I was off.

I headed west and got into Ontario, filled up on gas, and crossed the border into New York a few hours later.  The plan was for me to stay at the exact halfway point between Montréal and Bell Buckle in Beachwood, Ohio, a sort of suburb of Cleveland.  So I followed Lake Erie and headed down through New York (which is one of my favorite states to drive in since it's so gorgeous), Pennsylvania, and finally Ohio.  I arrived at about 7pm and died.

The next morning, I left at about 8:15 again with my thoughts fully on "I get to see my love today!"  My GPS had me arriving at about 4pm, which was perfect and not bad at all.  So I headed down through Ohio, met a little traffic outside of Cincinnati, and then through Kentucky.  I got some unfun weather around Louisville, but the weird thing was that the dead leaves on the ground weren't being blown sideways, but up, which is never a good thing.  So I lit on out of there.  Everything was fine until I got to Nashville.  At some point I realized that my GPS was giving me my arrival time in local time, which meant that it was an hour later than predicted, since I would be in EST until the last second.  Poo.  But when I got to Nashville, the heavens opened and unleashed a horrible downpour.  Honestly, I've never driven in such bad weather.  Visibility was practically zero and some people didn't even have their lights on.  We were going 35-40 in a 70mph area and that didn't  bother me at all.  I just wanted to get out of there safely.  And I did!  (I always pride myself on being a safe, cautious driver, thank you very much.)

I arrived at the house around 5:30 or so.  AND THEO WASN'T HOME.  I had a key, however, so I let myself in and collapsed on the bed after calling him and telling him to get his butt home.

And yesterday was a big day!  It was my twenty-fifth birthday!  Yay!  I'm a quarter of a century old!  Theo and I started off the day in a big way: we went to the dump!  It was magical.  Then we headed to Tullahoma to a really pretty area with the Rutledge Falls.  Oooo waterfalls.  There was a bit of climbing down rocks and hitting my head on one jutting out above me.  We reached a flat rock in front of the pool and the waterfall and Theo proposed! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

I said yes, obviously.

I also cried even though we'd been talking about it for weeks and I knew it was coming.  Because I'm sappy like that.  My ring is gorgeous and very "me."  Behold:

It's like he knows me or something.

That evening, we went to Bell Buckle Park where his wonderful, amazing family held a birthday party for me!  I felt so special.  There was fried chicken and cake with piles of chocolate frosting, so obviously it was a good time.  I love his family.  And him.  He's pretty cool, too.

Aaaand that's been my week.  I'm still recovering from driving.  Noodles.

Sometimes we make mistakes.

What mistake am I talking about?  Take a look at the date of the last entry posted.  Now look at this one.  Yep, I forgot to post an entry for June.  Since this blog's creation, I've always managed to post at least one entry a month.  After realizing that I had forgotten to post one at 12:30 a.m. on July 1, I thought about posted a really quick entry and editing the date to make it 11:15 p.m. on June 30 (whilst fully admitting that I was cheating), but, ironically (or maybe not), I was too busy.  So here I am admitting my failure.

To be fair, JBA is generally a pretty crazy time.  I moved into Ryle on June 8, the kids moved in a few days later, and we were off.  They left this past Saturday and now I'm in Hannibal to spend Independence Day and chill before heading back to begin Session II.  So much happened during JBA that cannot possibly be interesting to anyone who wasn't there, so I'll spare everyone the details.

Which means I have nothing left to talk about.  Oops.

Sneep snoop

May is almost over, which means I should probably post something, lest we end up with the same fiasco that was February.  So let's dive in, shall we?

We last left our little adventurer commemorating the Titanic.  So because of that, we're a little behind on her doings.  Oops.  Well.  I left Montréal and flew to Nashville on April 24.  My first year of grad school wasn't quite complete, but I had been given permission by my two advisers to submit my thesis proposal from afar.  So I spent two weeks in Tennessee with the best boyfriend ever.  I also chopped the majority of my hair off for a multitude of reasons, such as extreme split ends and wanting the black dye to fade out more quickly.  So as someone who is extremely attached and obsessed with her hair ... I'm coping.

I've been in Kentucky with my family as of May 8.  I took a Greyhound bus from Nashville to Lexington on Mother's Day for a grand total of $30; 'twas a bit cheaper than flying, methinks.  The original plan was for me to stay here until about June 27, at which point I would take a bus to St. Louis to work as a preceptor for the second session of JBA.  However, last week (I think it was last week), I received an email with an offer to be a preceptor for the first session, as well!  This means less time with my family, but it also means a lot more money and more time at JBA.  And the best part?  It means I get to see Kat sooner!  I'm stoked.  I miss her.  Just a bit.

So I head to St. Louis via bus on June 6 and will be picked up by the lovely David and Deb and I move back into the dorm on June 8.  Ah, dorm life.  I do not miss you.  (Although life in Ryle is much better than living in a Concordia dorm, let me tell you.)  I'll be a preceptor for the filmmaking class for Session I, take a few days off over Independence Day in between sessions, and start training for Session II a little while later.  After JBA, I'll spend an extra week in Missouri before flying back up to Montréal with Kat!

And who shall be meeting us in Montréal?  Lauren!  The three of us will spend a week together in Wonderland and it shall be fabulous.  And also the first time the three of us have been in one place since Memorial Day of last year when Kat and I took a road trip up to Wisconsin.  I'm so excited!  Once they leave (sniff), my second and last year of grad school begins.  Gulp.

And that's literally everything.  Noodles.

The RMS Titanic

Over the years, I have debated posting a blog entry on the anniversary of the Titanic’s sinking, which took place on April 15, 1912.  Last year, I came very close.  However, I always stopped myself, knowing that maybe a person or two would care, that most would skip over it, saying, “Oh, look, Ashlee’s rambling about the Titanic again.”

But this year, I felt that I had to.  On April 10, the 104^th anniversary of the day the Titanic set sail from Southampton, I began posted one status on Facebook per day, talking about what took place on the ship that day, as well as profiling some of the passengers and crew on the ship.  The reason I did this was because, throughout my entire “infatuation” with the Titanic, I have been mocked.  Countless jokes have been made about the sinking.  After 104 years, people have forgotten that the sinking of the Titanic was a real event, that real people just like us died in agony.  I wanted to bring their suffering to light.

With each status, I left the fates of the people I wrote about ambiguous.  Now I would like to reveal what happened.

Bess, Loraine, and Trevor Allison

Hudson and Bess Allison were visiting Europe and decided to join many of their friends by sailing back to their home in Westmount, Québec aboard the Titanic for her maiden voyage.  With Hudson and Bess were their two-year-old daughter, Loraine, their eleven-month-old son, Trevor, as well as a number of their household staff.  The only person in the Allison family to survive was Trevor.  Hudson, Bess, and two-year-old Loraine were all killed, making Loraine the only child in first or second class to lose her life.

There are many rumors as to why Loraine, who could have so easily been placed into a lifeboat, died.  I’ve read that the reason is that their nurse, Alice Cleaver, who was carrying Trevor, had gotten separated from the family and boarded a lifeboat with the baby.  Hudson and Bess refused to leave the ship without their son and therefore perished, not knowing he was already safe.  Only Hudson’s body was found, which was then buried in the family’s native Chesterfield, Ontario.  Trevor, though he survived the sinking, would die at the age of eighteen due to accidental poisoning.  He was buried next to his father.

Hudson and Bess Allison

Not much is known about the Andersson family in third class.  They were emigrating from Sweden to live with relatives in Winnipeg.  Traveling with Anders and Alfrida Andersson were their five children: Sigrid, 11; Ingeborg, 9; Ebba, 6; Sigvard, 4; and Ellis, 2.  Not one person in the Andersson family survived the sinking of the Titanic.  Some say that the gates below decks were locked, preventing third class passengers from boarding lifeboats in order to give preference to first class.  If that were the case, then it is likely that the Andersson family never had a chance, locked below decks as the water rose around them before they drowned with nowhere to escape.

Benjamin, Eva, and Esther Hart

The Hart family traveled in second class.  More is known about the Hart family because Esther and her seven-year-old daughter, Eva, survived the sinking.  Eva’s father, Benjamin, did not.  Eva was also the last survivor of the sinking to be able to remember any details, as the other remaining survivors had been too young at the time.  Eva has said that the last thing her father said to her was to “be a good girl and hold Mummy’s hand.”  She never saw her father again.  His body was never recovered.

The victims of the sinking were not only passengers.  There were seven main officers, in addition to Captain E.J. Smith.  Chief Officer Henry Wilde, First Officer William Murdoch, Second Officer Charles Lightoller, Third Officer Herbert Pitman, Fourth Officer Joseph Boxhall, Fifth Officer Harold Lowe, and Sixth Officer James Moody. Originally, Murdoch was to have been the Chief Officer while Lightoller was to have been First. When Captain E.J. Smith brought in Henry Wilde for the maiden voyage, both men were bumped down and, conveniently, Second Officer David Blair was removed entirely.

Of the officers, four survived: Second Officer Charles Lightoller, Third Officer Herbert Pitman, Fourth Officer Joseph Boxhall, and Fifth Officer Harold Lowe.  Chief Officer Henry Wilde, First Officer William Murdoch, and Sixth Officer James Moody all perished, as did Captain Smith.

Henry Tingle Wilde

William McMaster Murdoch

During the inquiries, some said that they saw an officer shoot himself.  This is most often assumed to be William Murdoch, though there is no proof of this.  Other accounts say he was swept overboard when a great wave washed across the deck.  He was thirty-nine.  Henry Wilde died trying to save others.  Wilde was last seen trying to free one of the collapsible lifeboats as the ship sank from under him.  Other accounts say that he swam to an overturned boat before dying of hypothermia.  He was thirty-nine.  The youngest officer was James Moody, who was a mere twenty-four years old when he died.  There are different accounts as to his fate.  He was offered the opportunity to man one of the lifeboats, which would have been his privilege as the most junior officer, but he refused in order to stay aboard the ship and continue lowering boats.  None of the officers’ bodies were recovered.

James Paul Moody

The reason I posted about these people was to highlight an oft forgotten fact: they were real people who suffered and died.  After 104 years, people seem to have forgotten that the Titanic carried people just like us: mothers, fathers, children, siblings.  People from all walks of life died when they should have been saved.  They were real people with stories, and dreams, and families.  They were drowned, they froze to death, they clung to the rail as the ship sank beneath their feet.  They floated in the freezing water, crying out for help from the twenty lifeboats drifting around them.  Only one boat came back, rescuing four survivors from the water out of 1,500 people who perished.  Put yourselves in their place.  Picture receiving a letter from your sister and her family saying that they are coming to stay with you.  Then you wake up to learn that the ship that they were traveling on sank and that she, her husband, and three children were all killed.

Just because it has been over 100 years does not mean that these people, nor their legacies, should be forgotten.  They should be remembered, not through auctions of plates, and glasses, and shoes sold to the rich who like collecting artifacts from the disaster.  They deserve to be remembered and they deserve respect.  Because they existed and 104 years later, their memory deserves to live on.  Over 1,500 people lost their lives that night and they do not deserve to be used as jokes all over the Internet.

I don’t care about the Titanic from the movie.  Yes, that was what sparked my interest, but that is not why my interest held.  However, one of the best portrayals of these very real people and their suffering is from James Cameron’s movie during the sinking.  There are no boundaries between the different classes, no privilege once the lifeboats are gone and the ship breaks in two.  To really understand the horror of that night, I encourage you to watch these two videos.

When you watch them, think about this: most of the lifeboats are gone.  Almost every single person running to save their lives will soon lose them.  Four people were rescued from the water, out of nearly every person you see running to the stern or jumping from it.

Thank you for reading.

Witty Title is Witty

The last entry totally counted as my February entry.  I have been told that it's not that big of a deal to skip a month, but this blog is almost five years old, and for the past five years there has always been at least one post each month.  So, despite the fact that the last entry was posted on February 29 at 11:52pm, it counts.  So suck it, Satan.

Alright, so let's recap, shall we?  We last left our little adventurer (me) when she was describing her trip to Tennessee and the subsequent surprise visit to Kentucky.  I also mentioned the beginning of a process, something that would be revealed later.  That "process" was the vocal training with my lovely friend, Gabrielle, to prepare to audition for a Québec-wide singing contest called Caisse qu'on chante, for which Bruno is one of the spokespeople.  Gabrielle and I had four coaching sessions and then she helped me film the audition.  I didn't make it to the next round, but that's okay, because the coaching in and of itself was an amazing experience.  So yeah.  That was fun!

Not long after I got back from Tennessee in January, Theo and I decided that we couldn't wait any longer to see one another, so we made the plan for me to fly back down on February 23 for the week of my midterm break.  It was painful waiting so long for February 23 to arrive, but I managed.  My wonderful Katie-Bear came to see me here in Montréal a few days beforehand, and we spent the day being bitten by wind and exploring the city.  I got to be a tourist again for a bit - it was fun.  Except now I miss her and want her to come back.  Or I need to go see her in Ottawa again.  Because she is perfection in human form.

So.  Tennessee.  My plane left from Montréal at six a.m., which meant I had to leave my dorm at three.  Ew.  But Theo was worth it, I guess.  After a short layover in Minneapolis, I arrived in Nashville at about eleven-thirty, several hours later than my arrival last time, which I'm sure both Theo and his dad appreciated.  They met me just past security, and Theo and I immediately commenced our usual (adorable) bickering as we went out to the car and then to Arby's (drool) for lunch.

We had fun.  We drove a lot.  We went to Franklin and got delicious breakfast foods.  We played his Wii U.  On Thursday, we picked up my second ever rental car, a Toyota Camry whom I named Izzy.  A few weeks before I arrived, I had noticed that Theo only lives a few hours from my Georgian family.  Not only that, but I would also be in Tennessee on my baby sister, Mary's, ninth birthday.  Because Theo didn't have to work, the greatest boyfriend in the world (him) agreed to drive down with me for the day.  My sister, Sarah, and I worked together to plan to surprise everyone,  Because apparently I can't go to Tennessee without surprising SOME family member.

We left early on Friday morning and arrived in Marietta at about noon.  (I had forgotten about the time difference.  Oops.)  The plan was for the two of us to meet Sarah, Momma, and three of my brothers (Michael, Jesse, and Jackson) at IHOP.  Again, as a surprise.  And surprised, they were.  After Sarah and I collided in the parking lot as a suitable greeting, she led the way into the restaurant and over to where everyone was sitting.  Then I was just like, "Hey, peeps," before being set upon with hugs.  It was awesome.  I didn't even have a chance to introduce Theo to everyone since I was busy being hugged.  Then we made more plans to surprise Mary at school and then to pick up Dad from work and surprise him, as well.  All of this required quite a bit of organization, but we got it figured out.  After a stop to pick up some balloons, we all went to Mary's elementary school.

Since Mary was being picked up early, we waited in the office for her to get out of class.  I faced the wall so she wouldn't see me as she walked in.  When she did, she got big hugs from Momma and our brothers (Sarah had to go do other stuff), all the while I examined the gorgeous wall.  Then, when Mary came back to Momma, I turned around and said, "Hi, sweetie!"  Mary immediately beamed and said "Ashlee!" before giving me a big hug.  It was magical and made me very, very happy.

After that, it was time to pick up Dad.  This required more organization since Momma couldn't tell him exactly why she wanted to pick him up early, nor could she text him and say that she was on her way, since he'd be able to see that she was fibbing.  Eventually, it was decided that Mary and I would go to pick him up from the bus station while everyone else waited at the gas station across the street.  Mary and I waited a little bit before she said, "There he is!" and started calling his name.

It took a bit for Dad to see us.  In fact, he has Resting Unhappy Face, like I do, and he was looking in our general direction, so I thought he was really angry.  But the second he saw me, he was startled, and immediately smiled and gave me a big hug.  Woo!  Then we all went to a really awesome park where we swung, climbed, and swung some more, before going to dinner at a BBQ joint.  Sarah and her fiancé joined us at this point, though Jesse had to go to work, which was sad.  After dinner, I gave Jackson and Mary the presents I had gotten them and then drove back with them to their apartment to say goodbye.  This we did and were sad.  Theo and I arrived back at his place at around midnight or later and were quite exhausted.  So we slept.

The next day, Theo and I got dinner with his wonderful parents at a bar to watch a band, Phoenix Rising, that they love and with whom they're friends.  The band was awesome and the members were super-dee-duper nice.  I liked 'em.  You can never have too much rock music.  The next night, we were invited to dinner at Theo's parents house, where I met his sister, her husband, and their two daughters.  Theo's oldest niece, who's six, adores me.  We're best friends now.  It's awesome.

I went home the next day.  And I was sad.  I cried a lot.  I'm still sad, in fact.  But he gave me his old electric guitar, a Fender Squier Stratocaster.  Her name is Lzzy.  I love her.  And I miss Theo.  Sigh.  I won't see him 'til May.  But he's worth the wait.  I guess.

ACK

THIS COUNTS AS MY ONCE A MONTH ENTRY

Un nouveau début

So 2016 has begun and quite a bit of stuff has already happened in the sixteen days that have passed.  The biggest thing to happen was my impromptu trip to Tennessee to visit my wonderful Theo.  It was magical and we had a crap ton of a fun and now I miss him and it sucks, but hey, what can ya do?  I also rented a car, a 2016 Ford Fiesta that I named Lucy, to drive six hours to see my family in Kentucky while Theo worked all night, and that was awesome.  Emily helped me arrange a surprise for my mom, so she let me in the building and then I walked into the apartment while my mom was sitting at her computer.  The look of shock on her face was fabulous and it took her a while to believe that I was actually there.  Then we drove to my aunt's place and I got to surprise her, as well.  Her reaction consisted of running to hug me and hold me tightly.  It was lovely.  I wish I could have spent more time with them, but the short duration was worth just seeing their faces when they saw me.  I suppose I can wait until this summer to see them again.  Sigh.

I've also started a process for something that will be revealed later.  Yay!

Yesterday was also the final show in Bruno and Guy's Musique et cinéma tour in Joliette, and I was lucky enough to be able to attend.  Three women, Line, Diane, and Johanne, were nice enough to take me with them to the town about forty-five minutes away.  The show was honestly the best one I've seen of this tour - it was seriously incredible.  More yay!

So that might seem like a lot happening, but the past half-month has been pretty packed, and I enjoyed it.  This entry is short, but I don't care, 'cause I rarely have short entries, so you should enjoy it while you can.  Toodle pip, kids.